the art of deduction
I’ve often joked about “so many men so little time”, which has its moments of truth of course (don’t shoot the messenger). Reducing your number of potentials is always a bit of an art however. Obviously you want to remain honest without having to disclose unnecessary information. In addition you want the freedom to date without the heavy of committing. Then of course you want to keep yourself in the equation with parties of interest.
With the Bachelorette having just ended a few short weeks ago, I know you ALL remember the toss up Ashley had between her 2 final boys (admit it, you totally watched it!). If you’ve been a veteran of the Bachelor/Bachelorette series, you will have likely witnessed this 2-person struggle at the end of every season. I think that’s a legit struggle we all share between the head and the heart.
You have the “good on paper” guy, who your family deems as the perfect fit for you. He fills in all the gaps that you’re punctured with, and has the “set for life” slogan stamped on his forehead without any gambling required. That’s head dude. Then there’s the make-your-palms-sweat-and-your-heart-race kind, who has you bursting with laughter and budding with inspiration. That’s heart dude.
I mean when you write it down like that the choice seems to be simple. But I know when you’re in the moment, talking yourself into or out of either one of those scenarios is a seemingly endless struggle. Especially if you have chemistry with both head AND heart dude.
It’s hard to say if Ashley picked for head or for heart (ahem, carry on), but it was clear from the beginning she was crushing on her final choice. I think she’s more of the “fallen” sort, and when it comes to emotions, if you’ve “fallen and can’t get up” well …maybe you should start using the art of deduction a bit more and leave emotion to a minimal. After all, love isn’t an emotion despite what you’re sweaty palm reader might tell you; it’s a decision …a deduction if you will.
Let me put it this way. If you’ve ever had a child (and are honest) you know it’s not an instant love affair (for most). Of course you CARE for them immensely, but you’re getting to know the tiny human who chose you. Once that love starts to blossom and you choose that tiny human back, THAT is a love you can’t explain. Not based on emotion, but chosen and grown pure self-less love.
If we could have that type of love for a/our significant other …wow, the places we could go!
If you must start with seduction (emotion), so be it. But for the love of Dr. Seuss …decide with deduction. That little thing called love will last so much longer that way ♥
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